Monday, April 29, 2013

What you see...

What you see sometimes can hurt. I have spent so much time in the secret place lately with Jesus. So much so, that some friends have been asking what I have been doing and where have I been. All I know to do is when I hurt... I take it to the secret place. When I don't understand... I take it to the secret place. When I want something SO BAD to happen and it doesn't... I take it to the secret place. I haven't gotten answers - but my burden has been lighten. I continue to get a "its gonna be alright" sense.. although I have no idea how.. I know He's got it. I cannot label situations with what I see with my naked eye. Because what I see at the moment looks absolutely nothing like what has been promised me. I mean it is almost the very opposite. But I am confident in what God has promised me for my life and I am hanging onto it for dear life. Everytime I go to him and pour out to him... I ask him to remove my passion for the things that aren't his will and to remove my narrow minded ways if he has things bigger and better for me that I cannot see at this time. I can promise that if it wasn't God in this - I would not hang onto it. I would not keep pursuing it. Because it hurts. I actually have never pursued something so much EVER in my whole life. I have never trusted anything to be so true and right when it looked the exact opposite. But I can with God. I can trust Him and what He has for my life. I know what that is... I just don't know His timing. Seems as things get easier to trust but they still "look" the same. So.. Today and everyday I choose to believe what he says is true versus what I see. Everyday that looks like crap... I choose to see beauty... I choose to see myself as He sees me, with who He sees me with, with what He sees me doing. I choose it.. always.

I choose Jesus.



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